lesbian love · lesbian romance · life lessons · spiritual awakening · Uncategorized

Front..and..Center (continued)

Whispers of fall are in the air, a cool morning breeze against her bare arms makes her shiver. The coffee steamed and she cupped her hands around it to feel its warmth. Her long wavy hair cascaded down her small shoulders, wisps of it lifted as the air blew across it. There was a silence broken only by the rush of water in the brook and the sweet song of birds making their way to find their breakfast among the flowers whose heads were already turning to seed. She looked down at her bare feet thinking that she needed to grab her slippers but she didn’t move. She was already feeling the thoughts of her, fill her. Her eyes already felt the mist of her memories. She needed to focus, push herself to think positively. She wondered why she couldn’t grasp and hold the feelings, they drifted in and out as if she were full of holes, she knew why, her love wasn’t there, her empty arms, her empty home, it all left holes in her. She regained her composure, walked into the kitchen and splashed her face with cold water. She was tired of wallowing in the blues and she was determined not to today. She walked across the tiles and then the rug and flipped on the radio, another voice besides her own in her head.

She felt her body swaying to the music. She sang along with the tune. Deciding to climb the stairs and take a hot shower, she let her robe slide down her arms baring the soft curves of her shoulders and collar bone and felt her body come back to center and relax. She knew getting back there, knowing she was finally able to control the flood of emotions that had kept her perpetually drowning, was a sign that she was coming full circle. She was be able to erase the fears and hold onto the blessings. It would take time but she already felt herself shifting.

The day’s sun burst around the clouds as she walked the dirt alley behind old railroad. She had kept to herself, busy walking and her thoughts were becoming sharper, clearer. She distanced herself from them every now and then, she needed that break from thinking and to just enjoy the beautiful mountains that rose up on each side of her. She watched a small squirrel, back and forth to its nest in a Black Walnut tree. The nest layed among the small leaves, cradled between two branches, another joined the gathering and they chased one another chattering. She smiled at how simple life could be…how something so sweet could divert her attention. She wondered, reflected, and decided that simple was the answer to almost anything, why did we all make it so complicated?

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